Of the Rings: The Lords and Frodo Baggins

That eerie view from a ravine. Staring at Isingard. That enemy's lair.
One must venture out of the shire of his comfort and do things that must surpass that that his Bilbo Baggins did.
Being a Frodo and saying yes, even with your heart still saying no. "This ring I must bear I said."
Support came from more than just friends.
I had an Elf, a Dwarf, a wizard, a ranger, a warrior, and best of all, three God given best friends.
We fellowshipped till I realized— trusting is no virtue.
But that wasn't all I learnt. I also learnt that, no matter how much you push away a friend, he will never leave.
The burden was growing by the day. The weight— too strong.
A ghost followed us. A living testimony of failure.
The one called Smeagol possessed by the gollum.
It was destiny that we cross paths. He was a constant reminder that we must never fail. That we must never give in to the temptation.

He crawled on all fours and ate raw games.
Sam never fell for his treachery, but I, told by another to pity him. And I pitied him.

And why would one not?
It's wasn't my place to judge him for who he now is. I showed him love where hate formally resided.

Samwise would scold him now and then.

We got captured by Faramire, the warrior's brother.
He too was tempted to take the ring from us but Sam screamed, "the ring drove you brother mad!"

He apologized like they all do after they realized their temptation.
And he let us go.
Smeagol was beaten and we lost his trust, just when passed a temptation for over fifty years and rebuked the spirit the tormented him.

We climbed up the steps at Minas Morgul, and Smeagol smeared my elvish cloak with the elvish bread we had in our backpack.

Smeagol convinced me, preying on my pity for him. And I sent Sam away. Alone, I went into the tunnels. Smeagol disappears and a vile looking creature appeared from the darkness behind me.
I brought out the gift bestowed to me by the so-called elvish witch.
"This will be a light for you when all other lights go out."
I fought the eight legged beast and made it out of the cave.
Smeagol wrestled me but fell into a Marianna-like pit.
Unbeknownst to me, the big spider stung me from behind and rolled me all up with its thick web.

But Sam discovering Smeagol's treachery had ran to my rescue. Thinking I was dead, he left because some orcs where coming.

Realizing how silly he had been for leaving after hearing the orcs saying I was only paralyzed and not dead, he came charging to their tower.

Now, at last, the eye of Sauron was diverted away from us. We made it into Mount Doom.
But not without the help of Sam.

"I cannot carry this ring for you, but I sure can carry you."

Then came the great temptation. I couldn't throw the ring into the molten fires of Mount Doom.

Smeagol came charging at me and bit off my finger. We wrestle some more and he fell into flames of Mount Doom together with the ring.
But not without the fake drama of Hollywood.
"Take my hand Frodo. Don't you let go."

Haba, over molten magma. Fresh one oh. E never even dey cool, nai person dey e never get first degree burn?

They made it, eventually.
There were times he said it was impossible.
This is life at its worst.

And they all lived happily ever after in elvish heaven except for Sam who is going to star in the third book.

Don't ask me the title.
Am I the one writing it?
Maybe; maybe not.

Proof Of Honesty

I finally got paid on 'MMM United' yesterday night. Sometime ago, someone made a statement on how a white person trusted him and gave him his 'MMM United' Account details to confirm himself. Same day some derogatory comments were made against our people by our own people (Nigerians). Well, the event that happened yesterday proved those derogatory statements wrong. I was matched to be paid by this guy (Justice, a Nigerian living in Nigeria) on Wednesday. I called him same day and got the response– "I will get back to you". Same response I got from a from a guy last year who ought to have paid this pending GH order but failed to, before 'MMM United' started witnessing hitches. Wednesday passed and came Thursday (yesterday). I concluded within myself, "another business as usual". I will have to wait for a re-match. Thursday night, exactly 22:20 GMT, I received a call from Justice. "Hello, is this Ojukwu Chukwu? I am meant to pay you on 'MMM United'. I am going to transfer the Bitcoin to your wallet now, when you get it, please confirm me." I said, "ok". He transferred the Bitcoin, I received it, waited for minutes (maybe 15 minutes) before logging in to my 'MMM United' account but found out he hasn't uploaded his proof of payment and as such, I can't confirm him. I called him to notify him about that, but he knows nothing on how to go about the Transaction ID. Two Admins in this group knew my ordeal the day I asked a friend and my referrer to help out on this (that's story for another day). I tried explaining to Justice but still he couldn't do it. So I had two options in mind, wait till his time elapses, and he gets blocked, then I will transfer his Bitcoin back to him and wait for a re-match, or he sends his Bitcoin Wallet account details so I can login myself and do the Transaction ID task myself. "To a stranger?" You might have asked right? Well, I suggested the latter only and the former as plan B if he refuses. He sent his Bitcoin Wallet Account login details and authorized me, so I logged in to his account successfully. You might say, "maybe there isn't much Bitcoin in his wallet. Well your guess is as good as wrong. He has over 10BTC in his wallet (you sure know the amount in there and he trusted me with it). I got the Transaction ID for the Bitcoin Transfer he did to me and that of numerous others he paid yesterday night. He offered to give me the details of his 'MMM United' account to help upload the Proof of payment but I didn't oblige to the request, but suggested he does that himself and learn how to do it while I guide him. I guided him successfully.

There are still many people in Nigeria who trusts strangers. The whites are not better than us, let's emancipate ourselves from that mental slavery.

Article by Ojukwu, Tochukwu

The Thing Around Your Mind

The Thing Around your Mind

So I applied for Mars 2030. I was just pranking these guys when the sent an email. They said, "congrats! We have been looking for you. Let's go build Mars together".

See me see trouble. I don't want to go oh. I was joking. "Person no fit follow una play again."

Two days later, I was coming back from morning mass, then I saw  a mail in the mail box. Curious, I opened the box and got the mail out.
"Welcome to Mars 2030 project. We are glad to inform you that we have your suit ready. Since we didn't have a suit your size, we had to make a bespoke suit for you."

"These guys serious oh", I said to myself.
"They didn't interview me sef. You sure say them no wan use me do experiment?"

Then at the end of the mail they said, pay a flight fee of 100,000 naira into first bank account.

I shouted, "Taa! 419."
😁😁😁😁😁😁

Before then I was busy listening to this song: Wish me well by Timi Dakolo

Personify This

Rivers are colourless
Roses have thorns
Ashes are made of black and white
Life and death are mirror images

Flaws are a story
Drama are betid
An experience is made
New alliances forged

Soldier go
Soldier come
Barracks continue their existence
No one remembers the sendoff

We all are as useless
As we are as useful
Are as glorious
As we are as dust

No more than a pack of breathing meat
Truly, truly, personify this.
A crown on a deceased king.
A crown on a dull.

Finding Nemo

On that boulevard not so far away.
Time passes like the illusion that it is.
Trying, is not everyone's best fit.
And this isn't poetic.

I'm trying to find a spot in my head.
This has a sentence in English
Finding my muse.
Cloaking cloaking cloaking.

Hunting for reason.
Hunting for intelligence.
Hunting for wisdom.
Finding little but enough

Creating sentences as they come
Whilst listening to a melancholy themed song
Always worked, ten on ten.
Create, I must; creating, I am.

Scribbling as I go.
Unembroidered, are the words I pen down
Ugly, Uninspiring, uncreative.
Was always the way I created beauty.

Slowly but surely
I twitched an eyelid
Spot found.
Muse filled

PS: Create what you want. Someone was the pioneer of that you now call beautiful.

THE CHAPTER WITH THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY

I brought out a piece of paper out of my missal. I cleaned the dust off of half of the pew. My roommate sat next to me— at the edge. Before long, two other guys and a girl sat on the pew. It was full by now. The girl sat right next to me. Somehow she kept on a hyperactive temperament.
"So you too, don't know how to speak Igbo, abi", she said.
I turned to see if I was the one being questioned.
"Hey, I'm getting better. You should have seen me way before now. You don't seem like an expert yourself."
"Don't mind me. I like teasing people."
"I'll report you to the priest."
"You're making me talk at mass", I chipped in.
"My mistake."
As usual, at the sign of the cross, I packed my things and started leaving.
I even forgot I came with a friend. Half way trekking alone with a favorite song in my ear, I realized something or someone was missing.
On getting to the hostel, he kept asking whether I got her number.
Then I realized he thought I ditched him for the girl.
It was useless trying to correct what seemed like the obvious scenario.
"So na where you take know am?"
"Na today be the first time wey I take eye see am. Wetin make you think say I know her before?"
"From una conversation."
"I don't know her. I just met her as you did today."
"That seems unlikely. With this your bone bone and wosky face. How she take gather mind follow you talk?"
"Guy, as you see me so, na how to chop dey my mind. You seem overly interested in her", I said giving him a suspicious countenance.
" I no fit talk about girl again?"
"No worry. I go track her down and get her number for you. Make you for rest."
"Guy I no send you oh. Besides, how you wan take track am down sef."
"Google it", I replied.
" You know, 'Google it' is not the answer to every question oh."
"Guy na wa for una oh. Una go church go dey chase girl", said another of my roommate.
" Guy, you no go church. We better pass you."
"The day wey I go ready to go church no be girl I go go chase."
"Guy na John chase the girl oh", I replied.
" Mr. Holier than thou, no be you the girl follow talk, wey you still come escort am?"
"He he he. Fowl nyansh don dey open oh, smirked the guy that didn't go to church.
" I no escort anybody. I come house straight. I no get strength for this talk. Believe anything wey you like. And you, no go church next Sunday. Dey here dey accuse the brethren", I slammed.
"I think I hit a nerve", said the guy that didn't go to church.

Let's call the guy that didn't go to church Ben. And the friend that went with me John.

Later that evening.

I was strolling to the ATM. I checked my card into the ATM and...
" You again. We met again. "
"Hey!"
"You seemed to have vanished after the mass ended."
"Ya. I think I do that subconsciously.
I don't really walk with people because I've got my music to listen to, I explained.
"A loner I see."
"What about you. You're a strong sanguine."
"How did you know that", she said with some level of surprise.
"Because you reek of it. But in a good way, of course."
We talked and talked.
Two sanguine meet. What do you expect.
Somehow, everything she said seem to make perfect sense to me. Even the weird ones. We were like mirror images of each other. By the time I checked my phone, I had spent four hours discussing with a stranger that really didn't seem strange.
But she would be the one that got away because one thing. Two like characters would tear up each other in time. It's one of the laws of nature.

THE CHAPTER WHERE I MET MY TIME PIECE.

'Twas 7:30am on a Monday morning. I had left home to trek for approximately thirty minutes to school.
I was Midway when I met a face, new at the time, but of noteworthy beauty.
It was Tuesday. I had left late for school. She would intercept paths with me really close to home.
I saw her whisking off, hoping she wasn't late. I had no time piece on me. I peered sternly at a clock in a shop and the time was 7:50am. I was really late. I hastened my footsteps and tried to walk faster than everyone in front of me.
A week later, it was Tuesday, I hadn't trek to school the days preceding today because I don't want to get flogged.
It was 7:20am. I was walking at my normal pace. I had walked past Midway the way to school when I met a face. Her face immediately registered as the girl I use as my time piece. I have her a smile but she didn't seem to quite notice. She was right not to notice. It wasn't for her.
I was satisfied by my earliness. I smirked all the way. I met a dusty class on my arrival. I hid myself in the wardrobe to avoid the assembly. When they were all downstairs, I came out. My coming early wasn't so I'll attend an assembly of students. It was to avoid the whips.
The next day I was to cross paths with her midway and this time she stopped me.
"You look familiar. Do I know you," she said.
"I don't know you, though each time I see you, it's either in late to school, or I'm early."
"Oh. And now?"
"I'm neither late nor early."
"And why do you say that?"
"I met you half way, you met me half way."
I never asked for a name. I never did need a name.

THE CHAPTER WHERE IT WAS INSOLUBLE.

'Twas evening on a Thursday. It was the penultimate day before my extra moral classes would seize. The mathematics teacher had just entered the class and then concocted a mathematics question— I think it was off measuration.
He was solving his example and as one well above what he was teaching, I realised it couldn't be solved. So I wanted to see what his answers would be.
Well, you could say I wanted to learn how he could prove me wrong.
He solved and solved. At that point I just watched carefully to see how he would escape the mess.
I wasn't one to let it go easily.
Alas, he would use a word I had only heard once before and it evoked uncontainable humour.
Two awkward intervals of silence later, he voiced out, "it is 'insoluble'".
" Hahaha!"
I literally laughed on top of my voice.
The term 'insoluble' reminded me mostly of a substance that can't dissolve.
I never really cared that it had a second meaning.
"Get out of my class, and I don't want to see you in my extra moral classes ever again. You lack etiquette!"
"Well, Sir, I think you mean 'social etiquette'. The word..."
I was still trying to finish when he charged towards me. I could be seen running towards the main road.
It was only a day before the end of the month, so it didn't matter that he drove me then.
Though I did apologize later, I can't understand why I was arrogant, with the fiendish display of knowledge.

A GUN, A GHOST AND TWO OLOKPAS

Lying down with my face on the floor. I felt the orifice of a gun on my head. A voice kept screaming, "so you think say you big pass this gun abi?
I go burst your brain now."
"Johnny calm down na."
"Oya Roger us the money now or we lock you for cell."
I made no movement. He hit the tapered end of my scapular. I wanted to scream but I was too angry to.
I believed I did nothing wrong.
"I don't have any money on me."
"So with all this oyibo you no get shishi?"
"We no dey joke oh. Bring money come out now", said the second guy.
"Lie down there."
It is 8.00pm
I'm still furious. I already killed them in my mind. Still on the ground, I felt sand in my eyes. But that didn't matter. I was too angry to care about that. I wished I could snap their necks.
"Guy, I dey hungry oh. Use that your one thousand that buy us roasted yam and bolle."
"You never pay me for the last time oh."
No worry I go use the money wey this guy go give us take pay you."
He crossed the road and minutes later he's back
"Guy money no reach."
"Na wa for you oh. You no get gun again?
Just show am gun and she go reduce the money for you."
"Abi? I no even reason am."
"As soon as I heard that, I realized this people can kill me, then create some crappy story about what happened.
I muttered a few hail Marys. Fear had gripped me. I realized they could kill me and get away with it. And nothing is holding them back.
Just then, a man walks in. He asked what I did, then paid the so-called ransom.
I laid there still confused who the man was and why he would help me. I couldn't fathom how a stranger could just come help me. I was even more scared.
"I hope I'm not going to be kidnapped for real", I thought.
" Young man, get up. You're free to go."
I stood up quietly, and just started walking away. The stranger followed me.
"So you no know say that place na no go area?"
I didn't realize how shocked I was till I tried opening my mouth.
"Yes sah."
Just then something bit me on my thigh. Turn to scratch it and at the same time I said, "thank you sah."
I turned around, and I could find no one with me.
A cold wind swept passed me and my head swelled.
"Ifite?"
Boarded a bus back to my hostel. As I sat on the bus, I could not stop thanking God.
"Ole ole ole ole ole ole!"
I just passed the common room and Real Madrid won a match. I stepped into the room and took my shirt off.
"Guy die by black hole!"
"I'm not in the mood for this."
"Die by mood."
Minutes later, I stepped into the bathroom.I scrubbed and I scrubbed. I could feel tears welling up just above the bottom lid. I got out of the bathroom and slipped into a blanket and slept off.

PS: This is a work of fiction. It is not connected to real life event.
Genre: Realistic Fiction.

A NIGHT CALL

I stood still for hours hoping the call would come in.
My name is Frank Alexander. And what I'm about to tell you is no fairy tale.
It is thirtyfirst of December, 2009.
I had left for church. There was supposed to be held a night vigil. The night was cold.
As I stepped into the church, and someone ran like in a scene of these romance movies and hugged me. It was both shocking and embarrassing. I stood there wrapped around by her arms and mine down as if being held strong by gravity. She didn't mind that I felt awkward by the whole arrangement. It was just too fortuitous. She said she has been hoping to run into me for like the past ten years.
I swallowed a thick big ball of sputum.
It's five minutes into meeting her and I haven't said any words yet.
She kept going on and on and I kept on nodding in the affirmative.
No doubt, she was pretty.
"I was going to go into the church."
"Are you coming?"
She said,"why, it's great out here."
"It's cool out here. And you know I'm not a catholic."
"She kept on trying to make eye contact.
I did often differed the gaze with a countenance decountenancing the gesture.
"what happened to your blue eyes?"
"What? Blue? Eyes?"
"Are you wearing contacts or something?"
"I totally don't understand what you mean."
"Ehn, what's your number? It would be horrible if I did forget."
"Zero seven zero eight one nine eight one eight two four."
My phone buzzed in my pocket. I was about to save her number when I got stuck at the name."
So I punched in the name Jane and saved it.
"You don't remember my name?"
I thought I discreetly saved her name to the contact but I was wrong.
"It's been ten years! Who would?"
"I didn't forget yours. Douglas Okoro", she said.
"And who is that?"
"You!"
"That is not my name! We are birds of a feather after all."
"What are you talking about.
Your full name is Douglas Chukwuebuka Okoro. Born on 14th July. From a family of four: three sisters and one boy. You are the only boy. Are you still in doubt?"
"No no no. Your making this up. None of that is true. I was birthed on 15th October.
One sister; three other brothers. My full name is Allen John Chukwuemeka Johnson.
Though you got the Chukwu correct."
"We attended the same school in Jos."
"No no. I've never been to Jos."
"I've never left Port Harcourt."
"But my parents moved down from Jos. But that was before they got married."
"So if what you're saying is true, how come you were talking to me like you know me. Why didn't you try to leave."
"I'm a gentleman. I can't let a beauty pass by even if it was a mistake."
"Akuko."
"To be frank, I'm seeing you for the first time."
to be continued...

"Five, four, three, two, one!
Happy new year!"
They both forgot what the discussion was and got lost in the euphoria of the new year.
"So what's your new year resolution", I asked.
" To stop hugging people until I'm sure they are known to me."
They both laughed.
"You are very funny. For one, I didn't freak out though."
"Thank God you didn't", she said with a shimmering smile.
"So do we just forget something is amiss here, she asked."
"I'm still pondering on who the person you knew was", I answered.
"Could it be a twin or just someone that incredibly resembles me", I wondered aloud.
"we would never know", she replied.
It was 12:30am now and the church compound was now almost empty.
They said their goodbyes and parted ways.
As he jumped on his bed, he murmured to himself.
"lying has never been this fun."
My name is Frank Alexander. And this is the story of my friend, Allen.
The time is 4:30am, and I just dropped a call from my friend Allen.
The End!